It's been a little while since I've updated this blog and I've been wondering whether I ever would again. I don't say that facetiously. I've been thinking about scrapping this thing.
I've been told several times lately that my posts are too negative, or too raw, or don't make sense, or just generally make people worry about me. Let me tell you this now, once and for all, I am not sitting at home alone in a dark room with a bottle of whiskey playing with knives or out pounding nails into walls my forehead or whatever else those of you who are scared for me may think is going on. Yes, things have been...we'll say strained...lately, both personally and professionally and there is still a lot of shit to shovel, but I've moved from the backhoe down to the bobcat and am in the process of shifting once again to a regular hand shovel. I'm a little ways out from moving down to the garden trowel, but I'll get there.
My road has been redefined rather brutally in the last couple of months, but I know where it points now and I'm actually looking forward to getting moving. I don't know how everything will shake out, of course, but I'm no longer concerned about that. I've set what wheels in motion that I can control and I've accepted the fact that others will just have to be watched and not interfered with.
So that's it for now, and while I know that this post has not exactly been a ray of sunshine, I do hope it explains a few things so you can all stop worrying that the next blog post will be ghost written, pun intended.
I'll check in again after Wildflower, though there's a decent chance that my race report will read "Drove to Lake San Antonio. Didn't race, but still limped home." Such is the way these things go. Until next time, and there will be a next time.
5 comments:
Ryan, I like your blog as is. Whatever is real to you is good for me. If people get weirded out - oh well. Not your problem. See you at Wildflower, man.
- Pat
Don't change the blog dude. It entertains me. Brutal honesty and cynicism are necessary... The world isn't all wine & roses.
did you ever read my PSA post (http://katiebfinallybackatit.blogspot.com/2008/06/public-service-announcement.html)? it's a lot like this one...i like your writing, but you already know this - so don't change it :)
Why aren't you sitting alone in a dark room with a bottle of whiskey playing with knives? Doesn't anybody else do that? Really? Damn. I dig the blog the way it is...it's you. That's cool. Keep it coming!
there is such a thing as a self-fulfilling prophecy. . .
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